My Own Worst Enemy

My Own Worst Enemy

Posted on 17. Aug, 2008 by in Self-Leadership, The Leadership Coach™

I was speaking with someone this week who told me about an experiment that two life coaches initiated. They agreed to speak to each other how they speak to themselves, so every time they thought or said something towards themselves, they said it to the other person instead. The experiment only lasted until lunch when they both broke down crying and apologised for what they’d said.

I’m convinced that most of us are far more destructive, negative and even vindictive towards ourselves than we could ever be towards another person and expect them to stay a friend. The trouble is we can’t get away from ourselves like we would from a person who made us feel stupid every time we made a mistake, who pointed out our every flaw, or who kept a record of every failure in order to remind us when we could least afford discouragement. I do that to myself. I am known for being encouraging to other people, and yet I say, out loud, “You idiot, Paul” if I make a mistake.

I can be my own worst enemy. An ever-present critic. One definition the dictionary gives for “critic” is, “someone who frequently finds fault or makes harsh and unfair judgments “. On the other hand I can also choose to focus on my strengths and not just my weaknesses. To be an ever-present encourager.

So if, like me, you tend to be harsh with yourself then this week try an experiment with me. Every time you are aware of saying or consciously thinking something critical towards yourself-

  1. Write it on a piece of paper
  2. Sign it “The Critic”, then
  3. Scrunch up the paper and throw it in the bin, and then
  4. Encourage yourself.

I’d love your feedback.

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Related posts:

  1. Braking or Breakthrough
  2. Look Where You Want To Go
  3. Frank Is Your Friend

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