Armchair Critics

Armchair Critics

Posted on 30. Nov, 2011 by in Leadership

Through the years of leading people experience has taught me that there will always be armchair critics, the only question is how I will respond to them.

While I welcome constructive feedback and critical thinking from those who share my values, I have no time at all for the armchair critic.

Armchair critics are the backseat drivers of this world. Rather than do something they prefer to criticise those who do. They can usually be found in the company of other critics picking apart what people do and say, from the safety of their comfort zone.

I heard someone say recently that, “Critics are like the eunuchs in a harem – they know what you’re supposed to do, but can’t do it themselves.” Sadly for all the impotence in their actions, their words still have the power to discourage and distract you if you let them.

Truth be told, I’ve let the critics get to me too many times over the years. I got defensive. I stewed on their accusations. I got my eye off the ball and focused on the hecklers. And as long as I focused on the critics in the grandstand I couldn’t play the game on the field to the best of my ability.

I’m determined to stay open to the right opinions… the voices of those who know and believe in me.. the perspective of people working alongside me. In fact I’m in very a dangerous place as a leader if no-one can question me.

We see journalists, police officers and presidents alike weighing the value of information that comes to them on the basis of the credibility of the source themselves. A reliable source who is close to the events is a precious resource. But if the source is without credibility and proximity it’s unlikely anyone will even read their “information” let alone act on it.

So leaders, let’s develop the habit of weighing criticism according to its source before we react. And at the same time, let’s cultivate a circle of trusted advisors around us who can speak truth from a proven track record and a shared vision.

Leave the armchair critic to his armchair. It’s called a La-Z-Boy for a reason.

“It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.” – Theodore Roosevelt (Speech at the Sorbonne, Paris, April 23, 1910)

I’d love to hear your comments and feel free to use the links below to share this article with others
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Paul Andrew is Founder of The Leadership Coach™
He is a Keynote Speaker and Management Consultant based in New York

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13 Responses to “Armchair Critics”

  1. John

    30. Nov, 2011

    HI Paul

    Teddy Roosevelt is a hero of mine and I have found strength and encouragement in this particular quote many times.

    I agree with your central thought here, that only those who share your vision and are close enough to understand the issues are credible and useful critics.

    Regards

    John
    John´s last [type] ..Rhythm of Life – A Journey of Self Discovery

    [Reply]

    Paul Andrew Reply:
    December 1st, 2011 at 3:53 pm

    Love that phrase ‘close enough to understand’

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  2. jim

    30. Nov, 2011

    Paul, I understand your passion about the armchair critic issue, and I use to terribly resent the tactic, however I’ve found that some people simply don’t engaged in a topic until you address it. In what I consider some of my most successful years, I’ve learned to not only listen to the Armchair critics, but to actually encourage their ‘afterthoughts’. It’s helped me become a better listener and in a few situations has actually helped change my opinion on issues.

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    Paul Andrew Reply:
    December 1st, 2011 at 3:58 pm

    Thanks Jim. I certainly have learned a lot from critics… it’s the critic who don’t merely spout opinion from a distance that I pay less attention to… everyone is entitled to an opinion. The more public my profile is though, the more armchair critics there are, and the more important the trusted critics become. At least, that’s my thoughts on it. I appreciate what you’ve added here

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  3. Rebecca Ryan

    30. Nov, 2011

    I love this article Paul – we must choose who we give credence to when faced with criticism. Who do we dismiss and who do we take note of? It is all well and good to listen to all opinions, but only those that are credible and help us to reach our goals are the opinions we should take on board.

    [Reply]

    Paul Andrew Reply:
    December 1st, 2011 at 3:59 pm

    Thanks Rebecca, that’s the big question . If we dismiss the wrong opinions we run the risk of thinking we’re always right

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  4. Don

    30. Nov, 2011

    Paul, your timely article reminds me of the phase “the seat of the scornful’ which indicates an inactive position where the individual is speaking from a point of weakness-once this is clear then dis-arming the criticism is made easier….I like to take away from these criticisms some learning and will typically note down 1-2 things that were said that may have some truth in it and try to understand the ‘source’….all of us indulge in this type of judgement, because of where we stand and what we stand for. Secondly, they strengthen me because they are so distasteful that I never want to be in that position……leanring is the key here, through listening and then from where you ‘stand’ move forward-Thanks

    [Reply]

    Paul Andrew Reply:
    December 1st, 2011 at 4:00 pm

    Agreed. A mentor once reminded me “I’ve never yet met a man from whom I can’t learn something”. That’s challenge I think. Keeping a learning posture, without become bogged down in the opinions of the true ‘critics’

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  5. Terry Couper

    30. Nov, 2011

    Have that quote pasted at the front of my diary – very good.

    [Reply]

    Paul Andrew Reply:
    December 1st, 2011 at 4:01 pm

    It’s a good one! On another note, I was with one Thomas James Green last week who was bragging about the achievements of a certain Terry Couper.

    [Reply]

  6. Jenny

    30. Nov, 2011

    I love the ultimate encouragement here Paul, ie the permission to give something a try and not be afraid to fail. The mark of a true leader is not just someone who achieves but someone who is able to encourage.

    [Reply]

    Paul Andrew Reply:
    December 1st, 2011 at 4:02 pm

    Let’s be the sort of leaders who find every occasion to encourage people!

    [Reply]

  7. Gail

    04. Dec, 2011

    I’ve learnt that you also have to weigh the comments of those closest to you, and of those also in the trenches. Yes, they may have wisdom to share from their view and experience, but in the end, it is only their opinion. After receiving the feedback, we need to then evaluate it for ourselves and decide both IF and WHEN we should apply it to ourselves.

    Sometime even the best advise is only given with part of the data needed to make it good. Sometimes the best advise comes at the wrong time. Sometimes the best meaning advise is still wrong for us even though it could be perfect for someone else.

    Yes, listen to feedback, but think it through before taking any action.

    [Reply]

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